Next steps. Little steps.

During the phone call from DFC, I was encouraged to join some online forums and groups, meet with other adoptive parents and see how I really felt.  Some of these I did and am glad I did!  I joined a couple of yahoo! online groups and have seen discussions about all aspects of adoption. People with children home, people waiting to hear they have a child, people whose papers have got lost in the system... people from all around the world who have the desire to adopt overseas, most looking to adopt a child with a special need.

I was told by a friend to prepare for an emotional roller coaster and I'm beginning to understand why. One adoptive parent reminded me that the process is "finding a family for a child, not a child for a family" which is a valid point. It's not me / us rescuing a child, it's our family being open to another child. It's us who will be receiving the blessing through a child, not "a poor child being saved" which of course is true, but not the reality.


Apparently our whole lives will be analysed, the family interviewed, our financials checked and our fitness as parents evaluated. Baring our souls much?

So while still not  100% convinced this is the way to go, my mind is still ticking over. Maybe I'm meant to be an advocate for adopting a child with albinism. I figure of all the special needs conditions, albinism must be one of the easiest to deal with. But then I realise each to their own. Some people need to care for a child with a missing limb, or with cerebral palsy. We all know our own strengths and what our family can deal with. For example, I know I'm not able to go back to sleepless nights, teething and nappies. For others who've never experienced that, it's their dream. 


Maybe I'm just meant to visit an orphanage..... but when I look, it doesn't appear Australian organisations visit Chinese orphanages; the Chinese are particular about who gets into their children. I don't believe it's to hide anything, more just for the sake of the children in care. 


I borrow books from the library about overseas and SN adoptions, which whet my appetite enough for me to buy a couple for myself. Then we go to visit my brother and his family.


My youngest brother and his wife have 3 little people in their lives and he has a very strong faith. Because I wasn't sure about my own feelings, I hesitated to tell him of my thoughts.


He said "go for it" when I eventually did bring it up. He reminded me to test and see if it really was of God, but the fact that I wrote "adopt a child" probably meant I wasn't to visit orphans or advocate for orphans. Pfft... I knew that but hearing it gave me courage. If money, time, pride or selfishness was an issue, God would sort it if it was His wish for us to have this child. I felt quite buoyed by the conversations with him and his precious wife. 


So baby steps along the way.....